I live to copy Tom

these are all my picks. I've demonstrated a thousands times by now that I don't know how to pick winners, just those that should be.RECORD OF THE YEAR:beyonce f/ jay-z - crazy in loveblack eyed peas f/ justin timberlake - where is the lovecoldplay - clockseminem - lose yourselfandre 3000 - hey yaAndre 3000 by a fucking mile. All the rest blow my dog.ALBUM OF THE YEAR:missy elliott - under constructionevanescence - fallenoutkast - speakerboxxx/the love belowjustin timberlake - justifiedthe white stripes - elephantThere are three here that I might have picked. I didn't here all of Missy's but I was quite impressed and Outkast blew my mind. But as much as it pains me to say it, Elephant by the White Stripes is my pick. I really think it'll go down as one of the great ones.SONG OF THE YEAR:christina aguilera - beautifulluther vandross - dance with my fatheravril lavigne - i'm with youwarren zevon - keep me in your hearteminem - lose yourselfZEVON ZEVON ZEVON! GENIUS!BEST NEW ARTIST:evanescence50 centfountains of wayneheather headleysean paulI hate them all so very much. Evanescense may be the worst. I'd like to see them take on "Fitty" in the catagory of suck.BEST FEMALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE:christina aguilera - beautifulkelly clarkson - miss independentdido - white flagavril lavigne - i'm with yousarah mclachlan - fallenI'm going to say....Angela Gossow from Arch Enemy. What? All these people suck. SUCK I TELL YOU! BEST MALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE:george harrison - any roadmichael mcdonald - ain't no mountain high enoughsting - send your lovejustin timberlake - cry me a riverwarren zevon - keep me in your heartThey are throwing a bone to Harrison with the nomination becuase of the whole dying thing. When are people going to realise that it won't matter at all to him becuase he is fucking dead. I don't care about this one at all, just as long as not only does Justin not win, but somebody keys his car on the way out.BEST POP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS:bon jovi - misunderstoodeagles - hole in the worldfountains of wayne - stacy's mommatchbox twenty - unwellno doubt f/ lady saw - underneath it allThis is another catagory where it would seem that all the "artists" would be much better off not being alive.BEST POP COLLABORATION WITH VOCALS:christina aguilera f/ lil' kim - can't hold us downtony bennett f/ k.d. lang - la vie en rosebob dylan and mavis staples - gonna change my way of thinkingpink f/ william orbit - feel good timesting f/ mary j. blige - whenever i say your nameI'm going with BD and MavisBEST POP VOCAL ALBUM:christina aguilera - strippedgeorge harrison - brainwashedannie lennox - baremichael mcdonald - motownjustin timberlake - justifiedHarrison. No questions, no calls.BEST DANCE RECORDING:cher - love one anothergroove armada - easymadonna - die another daykylie minogue - come into my worldtelepopmusik - breatheKylie. She's hot. So is Madonna, but I'm just sick of being aware of Madonna, and Kylie is someone I'm not aware of at all.BEST FEMALE ROCK VOCAL PERFORMANCE:michelle branch - are you happy now?avril lavigne - losing grippink - troublebonnie raitt - time of our liveslucinda williams - righteouslyBonnie. No you are wrong. It's Bonnie.BEST MALE ROCK VOCAL PERFORMANCE:david bowie - new killer starbob dylan - down in the floodlenny kravitz - if i could fall in lovedave matthews - gravediggertom waits - return of jackie & judyIt is always Tom, unless it is Bruce.BEST ROCK PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS:foo fighters - times like theseradiohead - there theretrain - calling all angelsthe white stripes - seven nation armywarren zevon f/ bruce springsteen - disorder in the houseNow I know you all think you know what I'm going to pick for this one. But I didn't actually here that Warren/Bruce colaboration becuase I couldn't afford it and couldn't download it. So I can't vote for it, not even on the principal that Bruce is always best. I have to go with the White Stripes because a) I really like that song a lot, b)I hate Train with a passion. If I ever meet that band I will cut off their feet. c) the Foos suck nowadays and I didn't care enough to buy Radiohead's new album. The White Stripes it is!BEST HARD ROCK PERFORMANCE:audioslave - like a stoneevanescence f/ paul mccoy - bring me to lifegodsmack - straight out of linejane's addiction - just becausequeens of the stone age - go with the flow<[Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<i'll>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.]these are all my picks. I've demonstrated a thousands times by now that I don't know how to pick winners, just those that should be.RECORD OF THE YEAR:beyonce f/ jay-z - crazy in loveblack eyed peas f/ justin timberlake - where is the lovecoldplay - clockseminem - lose yourselfandre 3000 - hey yaAndre 3000 by a fucking mile. All the rest blow my dog.ALBUM OF THE YEAR:missy elliott - under constructionevanescence - fallenoutkast - speakerboxxx/the love belowjustin timberlake - justifiedthe white stripes - elephantThere are three here that I might have picked. I didn't here all of Missy's but I was quite impressed and Outkast blew my mind. But as much as it pains me to say it, Elephant by the White Stripes is my pick. I really think it'll go down as one of the great ones.SONG OF THE YEAR:christina aguilera - beautifulluther vandross - dance with my fatheravril lavigne - i'm with youwarren zevon - keep me in your hearteminem - lose yourselfZEVON ZEVON ZEVON! GENIUS!BEST NEW ARTIST:evanescence50 centfountains of wayneheather headleysean paulI hate them all so very much. Evanescense may be the worst. I'd like to see them take on "Fitty" in the catagory of suck.BEST FEMALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE:christina aguilera - beautifulkelly clarkson - miss independentdido - white flagavril lavigne - i'm with yousarah mclachlan - fallenI'm going to say....Angela Gossow from Arch Enemy. What? All these people suck. SUCK I TELL YOU! BEST MALE POP VOCAL PERFORMANCE:george harrison - any roadmichael mcdonald - ain't no mountain high enoughsting - send your lovejustin timberlake - cry me a riverwarren zevon - keep me in your heartThey are throwing a bone to Harrison with the nomination becuase of the whole dying thing. When are people going to realise that it won't matter at all to him becuase he is fucking dead. I don't care about this one at all, just as long as not only does Justin not win, but somebody keys his car on the way out.BEST POP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS:bon jovi - misunderstoodeagles - hole in the worldfountains of wayne - stacy's mommatchbox twenty - unwellno doubt f/ lady saw - underneath it allThis is another catagory where it would seem that all the "artists" would be much better off not being alive.BEST POP COLLABORATION WITH VOCALS:christina aguilera f/ lil' kim - can't hold us downtony bennett f/ k.d. lang - la vie en rosebob dylan and mavis staples - gonna change my way of thinkingpink f/ william orbit - feel good timesting f/ mary j. blige - whenever i say your nameI'm going with BD and MavisBEST POP VOCAL ALBUM:christina aguilera - strippedgeorge harrison - brainwashedannie lennox - baremichael mcdonald - motownjustin timberlake - justifiedHarrison. No questions, no calls.BEST DANCE RECORDING:cher - love one anothergroove armada - easymadonna - die another daykylie minogue - come into my worldtelepopmusik - breatheKylie. She's hot. So is Madonna, but I'm just sick of being aware of Madonna, and Kylie is someone I'm not aware of at all.BEST FEMALE ROCK VOCAL PERFORMANCE:michelle branch - are you happy now?avril lavigne - losing grippink - troublebonnie raitt - time of our liveslucinda williams - righteouslyBonnie. No you are wrong. It's Bonnie.BEST MALE ROCK VOCAL PERFORMANCE:david bowie - new killer starbob dylan - down in the floodlenny kravitz - if i could fall in lovedave matthews - gravediggertom waits - return of jackie & judyIt is always Tom, unless it is Bruce.BEST ROCK PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS:foo fighters - times like theseradiohead - there theretrain - calling all angelsthe white stripes - seven nation armywarren zevon f/ bruce springsteen - disorder in the houseNow I know you all think you know what I'm going to pick for this one. But I didn't actually here that Warren/Bruce colaboration becuase I couldn't afford it and couldn't download it. So I can't vote for it, not even on the principal that Bruce is always best. I have to go with the White Stripes because a) I really like that song a lot, b)I hate Train with a passion. If I ever meet that band I will cut off their feet. c) the Foos suck nowadays and I didn't care enough to buy Radiohead's new album. The White Stripes it is!BEST HARD ROCK PERFORMANCE:audioslave - like a stoneevanescence f/ paul mccoy - bring me to lifegodsmack - straight out of linejane's addiction - just becausequeens of the stone age - go with the flow<<i'll go with queens, 'cause i'm sure that's what max hodes would pick.>>Of course I pick the Queens! That album makes my top 10 of all time. The rest of the songs nominated are FAR beyond sucking anyway.BEST METAL PERFORMANCE:korn - did my timemarilyn manson - mobscenemetallica - st. angerspineshank - smotheredstone sour - inhaleAs a self-respecting metalhead and purveyor of true metal I am faced with an interesting conundrum. All the songs on here suck. They suck a lot. I mean we're talking maelstrom sucking here. St. Anger sucks the least.BEST ROCK SONG:evanescence f/ paul mccoy - bring me to lifetrain - calling all angelswarren zevon f/ bruce sprinsteen - disorder in the housethe white stripes - seven nation armynickelback - somedayFor reasons that I have already explained I am choosing The White Stripes. Also, they RAWK more than Zevon really can.BEST ROCK ALBUM:audioslave - audioslaveevanescence - fallenfoo fighters - one by onematchbox twenty - more than you think you arenickelback - the long roadchoices like this make me hate everything.BEST ALTERNATIVE MUSIC ALBUM:the flaming lips - fight testradiohead - hail to the theifsigur ros - untitledthe white stripes - elephantyeah yeah yeahs - fever to tellDon't care about of for the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, didn't get a chance to check out the new Sigur Ros, sos the White Stripes it is again. To be honest though, I would have voted for it had I heard those others. I really love that album.BEST FEMALE R&B PERFORMANCE:ashanti - rain on meerykah badu - back in the daybeyonce - dangerously in lovemary j. blige - ooh!heather headley - i wish i wasn'tit's Erykah Badu for the head-gear.BEST MALE R&B VOCAL PERFORMANCE:r. kelly - step in the name of lovebrian mcknight - shoulda, woulda, couldaruben studdard - superstartyrese - how you gonna act like thatluther vandross - dance with my fatherI'm not quALIFIED to make any kind of decision here.BEST R&B PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP WITH VOCALS:beyonce and luther vandross - the closer i get to youstanley clarke featuring glenn lewis and amel larrieux - where is the lovefloetry - say yesroy hargrove & the rh factor f/ d'angelo - i'll staythe isley brothers with ronald isley f/ js - bustedtlc - hands upIsleysBEST TRADITIONAL R&B VOCAL PERFORMANCE:earth, wind, & fire - hold mearetha franklin - wonderfulanthony hamilton - comin' where i'm frompatti labelle - way up therekelly price - he proposedI say give it to Earth, Wind, & Fire. Aretha is overrated.BEST URBAN/ALTERNATIVE PERFORMANCE:erykah badu - dangerkelis - milkshakeles nubians - j'veux d'la musiquemusiq - forthenightandre - hey yaI'm going to let Tom pick for me.BEST R&B SONG:anthony hamilton - comin' where i'm frombeyonce f/ jay-z - crazy in loveluther vandross - dance with my fathererykah badu - dangerashanti - rock wit uI HATE BYONCE! that's itBEST R&B ALBUM:erykah badu - worldwide undergroundblu cantrell - bittersweetaretha franklin - so damn happythe isley brothers f/ ronald isley - body kissluther vandross - dance with my father <<jesus, luther, sorry about the stroke and all, but your music SUCKS. GO ERYKAH!!!!!>>YOU TELL 'IM TOM!BEST CONTEMPORARY R&B ALBUM:ashanti - chapter IIbeyonce - dangerously in lovemary j. blige - love & lifeanthony hamilton - comin' where i'm fromr. kelly - chocolate factoryI'm hereby skipping all r&b and RapGive it to Outkast or Deltron if they nominated him.Answers for those are all Toms BEST FEMALE RAP SOLO PERFORMANCE:da brat - got it poppin'missy elliott - work itlil' kim - came back for youmc lyte - ride wit mequeen latifah - go headit doesn't matter that i haven't heard 4 of these songs. any of you who think "work it" shouldn't win is clearly a dumbass.BEST MALE RAP SOLO PERFORMANCE:joe budden - pump it upeminem - lose yourself50 cent - in da clubludacris - stand upsean paul - get busyi don't know, here... i'm mad at sean paul for stealing the diwali rhythm that everyone else is using now... i don't know, i'll go with sean paul or ludacris.BEST RAP PERFORMANCE BY A DUO OR GROUP:missy elliott f/ ludacris - gossip folkslil' kim f/ 50 cent - magic sticknelly, p. diddy, and murphy lee - shake ya tailfeatherjuelz santana f/ cam'ron - dipsetyoung gunz - can't stop won't stopMISSSYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYBESR RAP/SUNG COLLABORATION:beyonce f/ jay-z - crazy in loveblack eyed peas f/ justin timberlake - where is the lovell cool j f/ marc dorsey - luv u betterpharrell f/ jay-z - frontin'snoop dogg f/ pharrell - beautifulbeautifuuullll...i just waaant you knowwww....BEST RAP SONG:snoop dogg f/ pharrell - beautifuljay-z f/ pharrell - excuse me miss50 cent - in da clubeminem - lose yourselfmissy elliott - work itwow. this one is fucking HARD. 50's song has a good beat. thank you, dr. dre. but snoop's beat might be better... and then there's missy.... for the workitshop's sake, i'm going to pick missy!BEST RAP ALBUM:missy elliott - under construction50 cent - get rich or die tryin'jay-z - the blueprint 2outkast - speakerboxxx/the love belowthe roots - phrenologyi don't get tired of "under construction". i just don't. and can't. and will not.BEST REGGAE ALBUM:buju banton - friends for lifeburning spear - freemansean paul - dutty rockthird world - ain't givin' upwayne wonder - no holding backit's sean paul. totally. SEANA PAUL.BEST POLKA ALBUM:eddie blazonczyk's versatons - versalicious!jerry darlak and the touch - polkas in black and whitelynnmarie - lynnmarie & the boxhoundswalter ostanek & bob kravos - just for youdennis polisky & the maestro's men - strike up the bandjimmy sturr - let's polka 'roundBLAZONCZYK!BEST COMPILATION SOUNDTRACK ALBUM FOR A MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA:chicagogangs of new yorkkill bill vol. 1a mighty windschool of rockKILL BILL MUTHA FUCKAZ! FUCK CHICAGO!BEST SCORE SOUNDTRACK ALBUM FOR A MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA:john williams - catch me if you canjohn williams - harry potter and the chamber of secretsphilip glass - the hourshoward shore - the lord of the rings: the two towersrandy newman - seabiscuit<<howard shore is a genius, and he should win. and i think that the grammys and the oscars have a contract that randy newman should be nominated every year. I HATE HIM SO MUCH!!! SOMEONE PLEASE TELL HIM TO FUCK HIMSELF AND JUMP OFF A FUCKING CLIFF!!!>>> I would like to add to this, Fuck John Williams and the movies he wrote for, fuck Philip Glass and Randy Newman so hard that they can't walk.BEST SONG WRITTEN FOR A MOTION PICTURE, TELEVISION OR OTHER VISUAL MEDIA:ludacris - act a foolu2 - the hands that built americacatherine zeta jones and renee zellweger - i move oneminem - lose yourselfchristopher guest, eugene levy, and michael mckean - a mighty windLEVY!!!!!!BEST ENGINEERED ALBUM, NON-CLASSICAL:black eyed peas - elephunkradiohead - hail to the thieffuel - natural selectionaaron neville - nature boyelvis costello - northI don't even know what the fuck this means.PRODUCER OF THE YEAR, NON-CLASSICAL:- nigel goodrich (radiohead - hail to the thief)- jimmy jam and terry lewis (mya - anatomy 1on1, beyonce and bilal - everything i do, kelly price - strong man)- the matrix (liz phair - extraordinary, hilary duff - so yesterday, lillix - it's about time)- the neptunes (neptunes present the clones, snoop dogg f/ pharrell - beautiful, common f/ mary j. blige - come close, ll cool j f/ marc dorsey - luv u better, justin timberlake - rock your body)- outkast (killer mike - monster, speakerboxxx/the love below)Are they only hip-hop producers anymore? What the fuck happened to Eddie Kramer? Rick Ruben didn't do anything this year?BEST REMIXED RECORDING, NON-CLASSICAL:christina aguilera - beautiful (peter rauhofer remix)beyonce f/ jay-z - crazy in love (maurice's soul mix)tori amos - don't make me come to vegas (timo maas remix)seal - get it together (bill hamel vocal mix)the latin project - lei lo lai (maw mix)I don't know who the fuck was the best but it sho' was not fucking Beyonce. God, I hate her.BEST SHORT FORM MUSIC VIDEO:johnny cash - hurtcoldplay - the scientistmadonna - die another daymartina mcbride - concrete angelandre 3000 - hey yaI'm torn here. Johnny had the better song and the more artistic video. It works better from the point of view of film in general. Andre's was just a righteous video as far as videos go. "Hurt" was cinema. "Hey Ya" was just a movie. They were both fantastic.